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March 19, 2013

Comedian Justin J. Johnson Reviews An Indie Album Based On Its Indie Cover Art – Phosphorescent “Muchacho”

This week’s album review:



Hola muchacho!  Get it?!  It's a play off the title of the new Phosphorescent album.  Right?!  

Okay, listen it's been a while since I've done one of these and I didn't want to start off by saying, "it's been a while."  BUT, now I've said it and there's no way to erase it, so let's just deal with it!  In any case, boy do I have a great album to review based solely upon it's cover art.  Phosphorescent's "Muchacho."

Now, let's set the record straight.  I'm a little biased.  I really enjoy Phosphorescent!  Back in the day I heard a track called, "I Am a Full Grown Man (I Will Lay in the Grass All Day)."  THAT'S MY LIFE!  I want to just lay in grass all day!  Honestly, nothing sounds better...unless the grass is wet.  Then it's uncomfortable.  But, regardless, I love Phosphorescent.  I mean, Matthew Houck, you wrote a song specifically about my life (laying in grass) and a tribute album to Willie Nelson!  You kidding me?!   Sometimes I just go to bars, don't order any drinks, wait for it to close and play "The Party's Over" on full volume on my iPhone.  Of course, nobody can really hear it because the volume on an iPhone isn't that loud...but it's the thought that counts!  

And then, more recently on "Here's To Taking It Easy," resides the tunes "The Mermaid Parade" (I LOVE MERMAIDS!) and "Los Angeles!"  (THAT'S WHERE I LIVE!)  All of this is to say...Matthew Houck...or rather, Phosphorescent...understands me!  

Given this understanding, you can see how anxious I have been to get a new album that will better understand me!  How am I to learn anything about myself if I don't have a song to guide me there!?  But, alas, it's been a little while.  And, as the story goes, Matthew Houck wasn't doing too well.  He was tired, and needed to get away.  You know, take it easy (get it?!)!  So, he went down to Mexico and started a Mermaid Parade.  JK you guys!  But, he did go to Mexico...and maybe he started a Mermaid Parade.  And after laying in the grass for a while, he emerged with "Muchacho."  

Now then, let's review this album solely upon the cover art...

YES!  I LOVE THIS COVER ART!  THIS MAY BE THE BEST ALBUM EVER!  (You can probably guess where I'm looking right now...there's a lady...umm...sitting down on the bed...and ummm...well...that shirt is sort of open...and...umm...you get it!)

I think the first thing I personally learned from this album about myself is...I NEED TO GO TO MEXICO!!  

But honestly...back to the music based on the cover art.  Besides the fact that there's ummm...a lady there...WHOA!  ANOTHER LEG!  I just noticed that other leg!  How many ladies are in this room!?  Is that a ladies leg?!  Wait, is there another lady under that poncho?  Is that even a poncho or a blanket?  You know, the one under the disco ball?  AHHH!  Is that a disco ball?!!  HOLY MOLY!  Oh man!  AWESOME!!  

Welp, if there's one thing we can take away from this album, it's that Phosphorescent is taking it easy!  Kudos sir, kudos!  

Matthew Houck is wearing a fun ass shirt, a cool ass hat, and has a dope ass grin on his face!  The party is on!  

BUT, then again...as we learned from Willie...the party has to be over at some point too.  And guess what?  The nights in Mexico may be fun when you've got two lovely ladies wearing your shirts and hats, but when you wake up in a gross looking green room with interesting art above the bed, and jinky retro lamps...you've got another thing coming.  The walk of shame is a learning experience...especially when it's out of your own room in Mexico.

I'm guessing this album has a touch of that.  Maybe it seems fun and relaxed.  You're having a good time, but you delve deeper and you see that behind any escape rests a real world that you have to get back to.  Or...maybe you never have to.  Maybe it's a permanent escape.  Like, you entered into the witness protection program, but you have to live in Mexico with lovely ladies wearing your shirts and hats?  Who knows!!!

One thing is for sure...I'm betting this album is more than just a drunken evening.  It's fun on the surface, but what happens the next day...welp, it's unknown and up to you to decide.  It's a drunken evening...that makes you think.  

DAMMIT PHOSPHORESCENT!  Just when I thought your music couldn't better understand me, you did it again!  

I give it five lovely ladies wearing my shirts out of five lovely ladies wearing my shirts.