Hi I have a lot of sex and am quite good at pleasing those I have sex with. I would like to share my best and most erotic moves with you. They’re below and for studs only. Feel free to use them. You’ll thank me later!!!
The first one in my rotation involves slowly kissing her stomach and then when it’s time for intercourse, ejaculating as I put on a condom. This is a move I’ve been doing for years and is pretty much my go-to. When I do it, most girls are elated and are like, “No, it’s OK,” which is the great feedback.
Another gem I sprinkle in every now and then is getting her real revved up with other A-plus moves and then ejaculating the moment I enter her and then going, “I tweeted.” If she faves or RT (which means she liked it so much she had to share it with her friends), then you know you did it right. If you’re not familiar with tweeting, Twitter is a popular social networking application people use to pick up chicks and discuss the Middle East. This move might be too heady for some, but if you can pull it off, you’re golden. When I use it, it’s awesome because it shows I’m really putting thought into these moves. Girls appreciate when you think about them when you’re climaxing rapidly inside their bodies. Feel free to add your own twist to it to personalize it, but be smart about it; The fast ejaculation is the crux and should stay where it is.
Here’s one that’s new to my arsenal but should be in every stud’s playbook: I slowly kiss her neck, gradually making my way down to her breasts, showing them just enough attention but not too much. Then before working my way downtown, I call my doctor and set up an appointment. The only day he’s free is two Wednesdays from now, which is fine because I don’t really have much going on during the middle of the week or any day. Anyway, I tell my wife that I’m seeing someone about my “problem” because I’m worried that I have an “enlarged prostate” which I learned could be the cause of my “premature ejaculation” after “reading the internet.” Anyway, then I put on my pants and find my wallet, which has my insurance card, and see if my insurance is up to date. It usually is, so I’m all set. Then I don’t touch her during the ensuing two weeks (it’s called tension and release and also something I “read on a blog or forum I can’t remember which as I’ve read so much literature on the subject it’s blending together.”) Anyway I go to the doctor and describe the problem. While there I orgasm in my pants to illustrate the problem. I flail my arms as if to imply, “I’m at my wit’s end here, doc!“ He’s then like, "Ah, tension and release” because he gets it and is a pro. That’s it. It’s a really complicated move, but if you put in the time to learn the order, it’s killer. Again, the kind of move you can put your own spin on, but just remember to use a doctor in your network. One time I used an out-of-network doctor, and while he was great and totally got it, and didn’t mind me ejaculating while talking to him because he knows this expert sex move, too, he cost me an arm and a leg. I’m still paying it off. I mean, it was totally worth it because of how good the move is, but just a heads up this one can be costly if not executed properly.
This one’s a curve ball, but variety’s the spice of life: If you have a girlfriend who’s one of those girls who’s always like, “Why don’t you do it like you’re not seeing a naked woman for the first time in your life,” try catching her by surprise by drinking so much whiskey that you can’t get a complete erection and you have to just cuddle, which is a thing girls love. This is a major stud move. And don’t worry about not climaxing. Moments after you wake up the next morning, you will orgasm because your bed sheets are really soft and you’ll open your eyes and feel them on your inner thighs and you’ll be donezo. When it’s happening scream, “What a life I lead!” and then go back to sleep.