Soooooo..today for my new sketch show "It's The Fiely Show"...(yeah I know creative title)..my pal Sally invited me to go to Brooklyn's Chinatown to be inspired. Well I got there and usually when I go to any city's Chinatown I get hungry...which I did...but I sacrificed my need for chow and and tried to focus and reconnect to my Asian Roots...NOW I KNOW I"M NOT ASIAN...I"M REALLY FILIPINO..PACIFIC ISLANDER as a matter of genetic fact...but after so many years of being cast as an "ASIAN"...I've given up and said to myself..."Well we all eat the same pets" so why not call us all Asian. I mean even the folks in the China-hood were all yelling at me in their native tongue and when i didn't answer back...they gave me this quizzical look and were stoopified when I spoke English and then slowly backed away as if I had the cooties.
Anyways after about 15 minutes...I learned soooooooooo much...I learned that Chinese men upon reaching middle age love to randomly spit while walking through the neighborhood...almost showing off..or it looks like they're marking their territory...also Asian kids are the CUTEST kids in the world...but when they grow up it's quite disturbing...I also learned that the Chinese sell the CHEAPEST and best desserts..tho my Caucasian host spat out the red bean paste roll thingy I split with her..but it's okay she looked right at home with all the other Asian men spitting on the sidewalk.
Hall of Fame