- Our Secret Santa turned sour last year, when it turned out he was a child molester in fact.
#xfactor Can we have honkey/cracker subtitles for when Rowland speaks?
- SHE tells me that IT annoys HER and SHE says I have a problem. Well that’s HER opinion, but I don’t have a PRONOUN addiction.
- Sorting the laundry. The only time its still acceptable in 2011 to say, “divide up the whites and the coloureds please”.
- Went past a car with Princess on Board sticker. Hope they’re prepared for the paparazzi chasing them and the subsequent crash into a tunnel.
- Haha, this old lady at the ATM is a fool. No point in covering the keypad, I can see your PIN is XXXX. Lucky for her I don’t mug old ladies.
- If one more person wishes me Merry Christmas, they will not make the next one as I will have decimated their face. Its over people!
#ILikedYouUntil the Rohypnol wore off and then you were all like “who are you” and “get off me”. You changed.
She’s talking about Dundee, isn’t she, that
#Rihanna? # we found love in a hopeless place # gotta be Dundee
- When I see the dude collecting trolleys at the shopping centre, I always imagine they have some fascinating back-story. I’m really deep.