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September 20, 2010

The story that takes you inside the scandalous world of internet communications on a website for playing and learning chess. Considered ground-breaking and shocking, based on true events.

         Like most regular cool people on a Friday night I was playing chess online. I was playing against someone who didn't seam that good, (she had a 1073 ranking) but said "hi" in the chat box next to the chessboard. I didn't want to say "hi" back because I thought it would be repetitive. So I said "Hello." I wasn't sure if I should have, fearing that it might sound too lame and overly formal. Of course I was playing online chess on yahoo.com so I couldn't achieve much higher lameness. She responded with something like ": D," which I think might have been mocking me a little bit. I didn't really know what to say to that, so I castled and waited for her to say something else. I mean what are you supposed to say to that?

         She asked if I had Thanksgiving where I was from and if I had fun. Before I could respond that yes I do have thanksgiving where I’m from but no I didn't have fun because the majority of my family is really annoying she typed "I did" followed by another one of those “: D,” but this I believe was different than the first, maybe winking. I still didn't know what to say to it. Then she said some other stuff that I didn't really have anything to say to so I just answered her first question as basically as I could.

"I'm from Oregon," I said, knowing that she would know where I’m talking about because I had noticed that in the background of her "Avatar" picture she had the Hollywood letters along that hillside. (Even though someone from New Zealand might not know where Oregon is.) She responded, " I'm from California," which I knew already, because of the Hollywood thing I already explained. So I said, "I assumed because of the Hollywood in your picture." But she I think misunderstood me sort of and said, "I actually don’t live anywhere near LA." and then in another line said "It's ok." implying that I felt bad about thinking she lived in LA! Then she did another one of those sideways faces. I quickly responded "But you wouldn't have had Hollywood in your background if you lived in Boston," and she said "that's true." and then said what seamed to me to be defensively, "I don't live in Boston," which I explained was just the first east coast city I had thought of. I didn't go into the details that I was an avid Red Sox fan because she didn't seam like the kind of person that would care and she'd probably ask if I was from there and I’d say no, and I just liked the Red Sox because I was a big Nomar Garciaparra fan, and she wouldn't know who that was and it would just be a big hassle.

         Then because her "I don't live in Boston" seamed to appear on the screen with the quickness that she really didn't want me to think she lived in Boston (although I tried to be as clear as I could about knowing she was from California from the beginning) I asked, "do you not like Boston?" Which was in hindsight sort of a dumb thing to say. After a few seconds she said, "No I like Boston." I contemplated saying "good," but didn't. She did a really bad move so I forked her king and queen with my knight and she resigned.