Up until recently there were two world-wide fads I hadn't whose bandwagon I had not yet jumped upon: Owning a cell phone and Twitter. Regarding the former, I've really just never felt I needed one. If you really need me I am not that difficult to track down; just look for the guy hanging out at the closest Build-A-Bear workshop, petting the bears and asking the employees if their favorite part of the process is the "stuffing." That would be me. See how simple that is?
As for the latter, I really had no excuse, I just never made one. I didn't think I would use it all that often, so I didn't see the point. However, a friend of mine asked me to make one along with him because he wanted to take the plunge -- sort of like the "buddy system" of going to the bathroom; we tend to go with one another because we figure if one of us is going to be touched inappropriately, we may as well be the ones to do it.
After asking me, the following conversation took place:
Me: I've debated on signing up, but I don't know that my awesomeness could accurately be conveyed in 140 characters or less. I would hate to short-change the public. Then again, I've heard it's a great way to stalk rappers and porn stars, so I probably will get on that.
Him: Ryan, Please get on Twitter. I could use your nuggets of wisdom throughout the day.
Me: I finally gave in and did it. @RyanSaysThings ...[2pacVoice]Follow Me! [/2pacVoice] Seriously, you'll have to find me, because I haven't tried to figure it out yet.
The rest, as they say, is history. I figured I may as well share said wisdom nuggets with all of you, because no one on Twitter really gives a shit what I have to say. Without further adieu, here is my first week's worth of Tweets (believe it or not, I have not made a single "Twat" joke) in newest-to-earliest order: