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December 22, 2012

Just because doomsday failed to be less destructive than Facebook going public, doesn't mean we are out of the woods yet. Scientists explain why the 2012 prediction was about as inaccurate as Apple maps.

Not to worry doomsday preppers, you may get to eat that supply of dehydrated chicken and cans of beans after all. Top Archeologists and Mathematicians from around the world agree that although doomsday didn’t occur on December 21, it doesn’t mean that it’s not going to happen.  Dr. Jason Korzenowski, a leading Archeologist at Georgetown University discovered that when everyone was decoding the Mayan calendar they didn’t zero in on one important hereditary aspect; Mayans were Mexicans. “We forgot to factor in ‘Mexican time’ into the impending doom countdown,” exclaimed Dr. Korzenowski. 

Typically, Mexican time equates to 23 minutes late; However, Korzenowski and his colleges agree that when you calculate Mexican time into the doomsday equation our imminent destruction is projected to occur sometime between now and 27 days away — or whenever the aliens decided to get off their lazy asses and do their job!