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October 11, 2016
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A peek inside the orange office

Official Trump House Press Releases:

Beautiful First Lady Melania has decided to paint The White House, gold, and it will also now be known exclusively as “The Trump House”.
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President Trump golf’s with Putin at BEAUTIFUL Trump National, loser Putin beats him. War. Sad!
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President Trump orders tremendously huge air assault on Vatican City after loser Pope (who is not very nice) insults hair.
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President Trump hosts Chinese dignitaries at The Trump House, after Panda Express dinner, President Trump accuses the Chinese of stealing beautiful Melania’s jewels. War. Sad!
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President Trump and Kim Jong-un, agree to meet. They discussed world views over KFC dinner. Talks turn heated mid-dinner when President Trump asks Kim if he thinks he is handsome, Kim replies “yes, very.” Kim, then asks the same to the President and the President replies “to be honest, you’re a little funny looking, Kim.” -Nuclear war breaks out as dinner is ended simultaneously.

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President Trump blames Rosie O’Donnell (who is very fat & loud) for starting World War III. The President declares capitol punishment for O’Donnell, for said crimes.
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