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Published February 02, 2013 More Info »
15 Funny Votes
4 Die Votes
Published February 02, 2013
I'd love to make little funny videos, but have neither the time, skill or cast to do so. So, I'm introducing a new series "No Video Skills Theatre" which I'm spelling "Theatre" instead of "Theater" because it is more pretentious that way. INT.  HOUSE - EVENING A party in full swing with people milling about or paired in conversation clumps. A man (Peter) walks up to another man standing alone against a wall (Charles). The man has a large red wine stain on his shirt. PETER Hey, Charles! How are you? CHARLES Good. How are you, Peter. PETER Good! Gosh, I haven't seen you since you were dating... um... what was her name? CHARLES Adele. PETER Oh right. Adele. Mm. Sort of an ugly breakup, eh? CHARLES You could say that. A woman walks up to Charles, angrily slaps him, and then walks away shaking her head with distain. PETER What was that about? CHARLES (shrugs) Happens all the time. PETER So, I heard you settle down?  Married now? Another woman walks up. Charles winces and then relaxes. He reaches out to put his arm around the woman. CHARLES Peter, this is my wife, Gwendolyn GWENDOLYN Hi, nice to meet you. PETER (shakes Gwendolyn's outstretched hand) Hi nice to meet you. So... are you a singer? GWENDOLYN I'm a receptionist. PETER Oh. (mumbles) So no castle. GWENDOLYN What's that? PETER You're not rich, own a house like a castle, nothing like that. GWENDOLYN No. PETER Hm. Woman storms up and throws a glass of wine in Charles' face. WOMAN (screaming at Charles) How could you DO that to her? She LOVED YOU! SHE. LOVED. YOU! (woman sobs and runs off) CHARLES (calmly) Dear, the towel... Gwendolyn reaches into her large purse and pulls out a towel already stained with red wine. She hands it to Charles who uses it to wipe his face and chest. PETER you ever talk to Adele anymore? CHARLES (cleaning himself off) She stopped by unexpectedly the one time. Other than that, no. PETER That new guy of hers is sort of like you. CHARLES No. Not really. He's better. He's a lot, lot better. PETER Oh. least you know she wishes the best for you. CHARLES (stares at Peter for several seconds) Shut up. OK Peter? Just shut up. PETER Right. Well, no worries. Sometimes it lasts in love and sometimes it hurts --- CHARLES SHUT. UP. Peter nods and wanders off as another woman walks by and slaps Peter. CHARLES (to Gwendolyn) You were right. Too soon. Think it's time to go. Gwendolyn nods and they leave.