During the holidays people should come together and love each other.
But when it comes to you we are never far enough apart
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To my ex on a special day
Thank you for making me gay
I’ve heard the good news
You’re pregnant news travels fast when you get around
Just a little goodbye before you leave town
Goodbye, so long, glad you’re gone
I know your in a bind and I’d like to help you out
But can’t because all my money went to your welfare
Thinking of you and thought you could use a vacation
Enclosed is a one way ticket to hell
# 3 Dad
Happy fathers day to the third best Dad. Almost number one.
But as you taught me almost doesn’t count.
Congratulations on your cross into womanhood.
Next time think of your reputation before losing your virginity to guy you don’t know.
Thinking of you
Actually I was thinking of _____ people and you were the first person who came to mind.
Another year closer to receiving my inheritance.
Not really I just wanted to remind you how glad I am you are not here.
Congrats on your new baby
Who’s the father
Late B-day card. Sorry it took so long
I was deciding weather or not your worth a present and your not. So here is this card.
Forgot your Birthday
Because I am still trying to forget the day you were born
To my friend
I woke up today and realized I hate you
To my sibling
Are you sure you weren’t adopted
Happy Grandparents Day
You could not raise my parents. So what makes you think you could help raise me