Everybody wants to be a good kisser, but how do you know what you’re doing wrong? We talked to some real pros and got some insider tips on kissing, so study up on these before your next smooch!
Respectfully decline one from any mobster you’ve wronged.
To make sure your kiss hits perfectly, look at your partner’s elbow as you do it.
Use less toe than you think you should.
Microwave ground beef for 30 seconds to practice on.
If you say “Damn not this one either!” You can kiss as many frogs as you like without judgement.
Before you kiss whisper “Welcome to Tongue-Town, Population: Us.”
If you’re kissing a lefty, do all your moves mirror image.
The secret is to recite the ABCs into your partner’s mouth.
Always keep an olive under your tongue and give it to your partner as a treat.
Try not to yell at all if you can help it.
Since you’ll be unable to talk, express your enthusiasm during the
kiss with repeated thumbs up.
Stop kissing every 5 seconds to make sure they’re not dead.
Immediately following each kiss, be sure to mark the length down in your “Kiss Length Book” and make sure your partner does as well.
Remember it’s not about who wins or who loses, it’s about having a good time.
Still, try to win.