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March 05, 2012


A son walks into the bathroom one morning while his dad is shaving. "Dad" said the boy, "what's the meaning of life?" The father thought long and hard considering the ideas of great philosophers and spiritual leaders, but also about his own experimentation with psychedelics. Fearful that his son might be using drugs, he slaps him in the face and tells him to stop thinking evil thoughts. When they arrived at church later that day the boy approaches the sunday school teacher and asks him the same question. "Well, Barry" said the sunday school teacher, "that's a very interesting question. Why don't you come here with me into this broom closet and I'll SHOW you!" The man then proceeds to molest young Barry in an uncomfortable manner. The next day at school Barry approaches his math teacher and asks her what the meaning of life is. Mrs. Richards, who was currently going through a messy divorce, could only muster a few words before bursting into tears, her ex being a philosopher of sorts you see, and those words were "Up yours kid." This made Barry think of his sunday school teacher, so he started crying too. As he was slumped over, crying in a pool of his own urine, a girl walked up to him asking why he was crying. It was little Susie Jo, a girl Barry had a crush on. He dried up his tears and and started to tell her his story, but before he could say anything she spit on him and skipped away laughing. When the SWAT team arrived to try and suppress Barry's killing spree, one cop turns to the other and said "Insert punchline here!"