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Published: February 25, 2012

A prominent writer for Funny or Die has suffered an excrutiating loss this afternoon.

Howard Bergstein's phone has died. The death was expected to occur, but not quite so abruptly.

"I was on the phone with my mother. She was telling me about her last book club meeting. I set the phone down during her story, as I normally do, and the next minute it was dead!" Says Howard, through muffled whimpers.

The phone had been at 2% battery life for about twenty minutes during the phone call.

Services will not be held on Saturday, February 25th from 5:19pm-5:35pm.

In lieu of flowers, Bergstein has requested donations be made towards purchasing a better phone charger.

Tags: phone death