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November 20, 2015

An article about various odd associations, particularly the National Association of Liars.

One of the best things about the internet is its ability to bring people together. You may be in some bizarre situation like being a bungee jumper with a fear of heights. You may have a disease so obscure that it has been named after you. You might believe that the world is really run by satanistic teletubbies from an underground bunker in Chipping Sudbury. The thing is that it does not matter how fantastically unlikely your position is, you will not be the only one. It is human nature for minorities to want to cluster together for support which is why we have such improbable organisations as the Red and Nearly Ginger Association, the Association of Gay Grocers and several introvert dating clubs. I have would like to draw your attention to another bizarre association, The National Association of Liars.

You may well be thinking ‘You just made that up.’ and you could certainly be forgiven for thinking so. I must admit I was hesitant to join an organisation when I was not sure I could believe a word they said. What overcame that objection was their tagline ‘If you can’t trust the National Association of Liars, who can you trust?’ a question that seems to be both ludicrous and plausible at the same time. I started off by looking at their website. If it is a joke it is a very professional looking one that someone has clearly put a lot of effort into. An hour later I was hooked. There is a game there called ‘Pants on Fire’ which involves you as a fireman trying to extinguish burning underwear as it flies across the screen. If you start hosing down underwear that is not on fire, that is considered ‘wetting your pants’ for which you are penalised. Simple? Yes. Childish? Yes. Fun? Absolutely.

Most websites have a Frequently Asked Questions page that should really be called ‘Questions We Would Like You To Ask’ because they never answer your question. This charge at least cannot be leveled at the National Association of Liars. This is the answer to the question ‘How much does it cost to join?’. ‘It is completely free to join the organisation. That said, the five pound ‘pay in person at midnight on the 29th of February standing on one leg and whistling the Jerusalem the Golden discount’ clearly will not apply to those that choose not to avail themselves of this generous offer. There is also a five pound administrative charge, a three pound concession fee, ancillary charges adding up to another four pounds and a three pound green energy surcharge.‘ Does this sound familiar?

I could go on but I doubt you would believe a word I say so I will refer you to the website in question www.liars.org.uk I am sure it will raise a smile, and that’s the truth.