If you believe the president, his administration is currently experiencing the greatest witch hunt in American history. That’s a bold claim, but, before we brush it aside, let’s see how the Russia investigation actually stacks up against the most notable witch hunt of American history:
Salem: Deeply divided between two contentious parties, heavily influenced by manipulative religious factions, and involved in seemingly unending warfare with a complex web of enemy nations and tribal groups.
Russia Investigation: Same, but also Twitter and Facebook.
Salem: A young child, believed to be possessed by a witch, spouting gibberish and acting uncontrollably.
Russia Investigation: An old man, believed to be possessed by a young child, spouting gibberish and acting uncontrollably.
Most Sensational Claim
Salem: Witches’ Coven
Russia Investigation: Troll’s Covfefe
Captive with an Unusual Name Doomed to be Thrown Under the Bus
Russia Investigation: Reince Priebus
Alleged Signs of Evil Presence
Salem: Pinched skin, red cats, black dogs, and a white-haired man who makes you sign the devil’s book
Russia Investigation: Orange skin, Russian diplomats, glowing orbs, and the same white-haired man who makes you sign the devil’s book and his name is Steve Bannon.
Salem: Convulsive ergotism from rye bread.
Russia Investigation: Compulsive egotism from liar’s head
Were Lots of Innocent People Murdered in a Truly Tragic Case of Ruthless Scapegoating and Mass Hysteria?
Russia Investigation: No
Was it Just an Impetuous Leader Who Continues to Make a Bad Situation Worse by Suspiciously Trying to Block an Investigation into a Credible Threat Surrounding His Administration and Then Straight Up Admitting to It?
Russia Investigation: Yes