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Published November 14, 2009 More Info »
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Published November 14, 2009
a rapid end at that.  so rapid that i have decided to give up proper grammar and punctuation -- thank you twitter.  what have we seen this year?  we've seen the first black american president take office.  we've seen nasa crash crap into the moon.  we've seen balloon boy.  it has been a pretty hectic and interesting year.  a man has set foot on neptune.  jingle bells has become the new national anthem.  potato chips now cure asthma.  what a wonderful year!  movie theatres now give away free cars with the purchase of a jumbo size popcorn.  elvis came back from the dead and had a top ten billboard hit for 3 weeks straight before dying on the toilet once again.  the taco bell dog's son became the mascot for hebrew national hot dogs.  big things.  you may or may not recall george w. bush learning how to read... but that, too... was a big event.  good job, pal... remember to sound out the words in your head before you say them aloud.  other big happenings in 2009: cheetos are now used as currancy and flaming hot cheetos are the new "benjamins"... the most popular name for newborn boys was "cleetus" (i.e. cleetus, previous fetus)... i grew a third eyebrow in the middle of my forehead... a boa constrictor named "ralph m. jenkins" ran for class president... girl's pants got so low that now it's fashionable to show front and back coin slots... weird al's "eat it" replaced "take me out to the ball game" during the 7th inning stretch at baseball games... underarm deodorant is now banned in several countries.  2009, what a year.  thanks for the memories.

your bestest pal,
mike
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