Full Credits

Stats & Data

0Funny
0Die
191
Views
February 06, 2009
Published
Description

-

(from my blog at whatgives.gainesville.com)

Dear insurance companies,

I just want to take this opportunity to say thank you.

You catch a lot of flak from the never-satisfied masses, those ne’er-do-wells who expect you to ... you know ... fulfill your obligations, be there when the chips and (the roofs) are down, not flee the state.

Picky, picky, picky.

No one ever gives you credit for all the wonderful things you do.

Well, that ends right here.

Thanks for treating Florida like the whole state caught the bubonic plague. We had it coming. We broke the golden rule: Never allow anything to happen that costs you money. We should have formed a human chain to keep those hurricanes at bay a few years back. Paying for the privilege of being treated like a pariah is the least we can do.

Speaking of which, thanks for perpetually trying to raise our rates. Your never-say-too-high attitude is refreshing. Even when the state slaps your requests down, you keep at it. And way to dream big. Anyone can ask for a 10 percent bump. It takes real grit to say, “How about 50? Do I hear 70?” Your courage is overwhelming.

Thanks for not discriminating. Coastal, inland, never filed a claim. What’s the difference? We’re all the same to you. It makes my heart swell when I think about it.

Thanks for writing your policies in such a manner that only a lawyer could understand them. You set the bar high and give us something to strive for. Oh, and, kudos for sending out so many copies of those policies and forms. Who needs trees anyway? No trees, no more raking the leaves. Everybody wins.

Thanks for taking your time when folks file claims. So much of life is rush, rush, rush. Nobody wants to stop and smell the mildew anymore.

Yes, there are many thanks to be had.

And you deserve every one.
Advertisement