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April 26, 2017
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Whisper into her ear, “I know something else that’s cold, hard, and 6 feet under.” Then wink and point to the grave where you buried your penis

Funerals are sad for everyone. And that goes double for the widow. So the next funeral you go to where a woman is in need of comfort over the loss of her husband, try one of these tricks to pick up her spirits!


Start a “bring him back!” chant

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Remind her of the bad times

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Flash mob dance to “Single Ladies”

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Photoshop pictures of her husband cheating on her

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Remind her that she’ll have extra space in the bed now

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Whisper into her ear, “I know something else that’s cold, hard, and 6 feet under.” Then wink and point to the grave where you buried your penis

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Ask the funeral DJ to play her favorite song

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Dress and talk exactly like her late husband

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Remind her that she never has to hear “MY WIFE!” again

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