WELCOME TO WOODBURY ( A visitor's guide to the zombie apocalypse's heaven)
Founded: Season 3
Population: About 3-5 main characters the rest are walkers food
Mayor: The Governor
Town Motto: Curiosity didn't kill the cat. A bullet to the head did after the cat kept on asking questions.
HELLO THERE! Thank you for your interest in visting Woodbury. You might be thinking what is there to do in that town. Well let me tell you the many family friendly activities that we have here!
Our most popular attraction is our Ring of Zombie Fights. That is where 2 lucky citizens or traitors (see above picture) fight while being surrounded by a ring of zombies. You might say "Hey that seems kind of dangerous and pointless." and to that I will say
WE ALSO HAVE DAILY BARBECUES!!!:
What better way to forget about watching your family get ripped to shreds in front of you than eating some other animal and for all of our foodies out there that what to see what is all the fuss is about we have our own "Man-Wiches"!!!!!............Hey if it is good enough for Ethan Hawke than it is good enough for you.
While visting our small town you might notice everyone is driving new Kias around. We are not sure how that happened but I will say Kia are the most affordable and reliable cars out there. They are also the key to surviving the zombie apocalypse. Some people say Fords are the best "Ford means First on race day" Nope Here Ford means:
O: ONE THAT GETS
R: RIPPED APART AND
D: DERSERVES TO DIE CAUSE THEY WERE NOT SMART ENOUGH TO BUY A KIA OVER A FORD
Woodbury is also home to the best doctor (left) in the world Dr. Mamet or as we all call him "doctor" Mamet. You might recall Dr. Mamet winning the 2006 Biggest Bitch/Pussy award by Time Magazine. Have fun watching him do his experiments on the walking dead. Like the one where he trys to turn them back by playing music or something or watch the other waste of time ones that don't make any sense at all...........Now that I think about it I think we only keep him around cause of his tea. MAN ALIVE! That shit is great. I don't know what school you can become a doctor in tea making but I am guessing he went to it.
Do you have small children that are infected? NO WORRIES!!! We have THE best air vents to chain them up in! They are so good our own Mayor used them for his daughter Penny! (Do not ask about her)
Come vist our aquarium. Who needs to watch sharks and fish when you can stare at like 36 heads floating around in fish tanks. Now I will say that this room is kind of a secret so I would not go around asking about it. Matter of fact lets forget I even said anything
SO COME TO WOODBURY! WHERE THE ONLY THING YOU WILL BE BITTEN BY IS FUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!