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October 21, 2014
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A woman in Florida wants Toys ‘R Us to stop selling Breaking Bad dolls. She has started a petition to ask the toy giant to remove Walter White dolls, which come with toy meth, from the shelves.

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This is a terrible toy to buy your child unless you want them to grow up awesome.

A woman in Florida wants Toys ‘R Us to stop selling Breaking Bad dolls. She has started a petition to ask the toy giant to remove Walter White dolls, which come with toy meth.

“Toys R Us is well known around the world for their vast selection of toys for children of all ages,” she wrote, according to CNN. “However their decision to sell a Breaking Bad doll, complete with a detachable sack of cash and a bag of meth, alongside children’s toys is a dangerous deviation from their family friendly values.”

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Could a toy that comes with so many cute outfits really be all that bad?

“Kids mimic their action figures, if you will,” she added. “Do you want your child in an orange jumpsuit?”

Um, if I recall correctly, Walter White did not end up in an orange jumpsuit. He ended up dying in a blaze of glory at the hands of an awesome car trunk gun of his own design.

If anything, Toys ‘R Us should have more toys that introduce our nation’s precious children to great characters from quality television. Here are a few suggestions.

  • Don Draper action figure: Pull the string on his back and he will give a wistful monologue about Rice Krispies while staring into the middle distance. Accessories include scotch, cigar, and crying woman.
  • The Wire © My First Dream Housing Project: Explore all your favorite spots in The Pit, including the Barksdale gang drug couch, the surveillance spot on the roof, and a secret surprise! (Psst: It’s Wallace’s dead body!)
  • A Ross Gellar doll from Friends! This is the creepiest thing you could sell a child.
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It looks like Toys ‘R Us has already pulled the products from their online listings, but they’re still available from that bastion of integrity Walmart.com


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