Toddler "This Close" To Giving Up Nose And Bum Picking

Four-year-old Timmy Jefferson claims he is "this close" to ending his nose and bum picking habit though admits for now he's going to continue doing it.  The toddler's announcement came as he played in the sandbox at recess with his classmates this past Tuesday at Bayview Middleton School.  "You guys promised that if I picked my nose and my bum, I could make bubblegum.  I've tried this for a few weeks but I’m still waiting for results. I'm not calling you guy’s liars but part of me can't help feel like you're holding out on me.  Maybe I need to pick my ear too?  To be honest, I am this close to ending this experiment but will give it another few months just to be certain."

Timmy states that ending his nose and bum picking will give him more time to focus on his real passion in life, shitting in his pants.