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February 21, 2012

some depressing limericks. (www.noonediesforever.com for more upsetting/shitty poetry.)


there one was a man named Otis 
who would always sit in a half lotus 
but since he had no friends
to acknowledge this trend
he just died, and nobody noticed

Mr. Jones from the store was so friendly
that when something was slighty too spendy
he would lend you five bucks 
which, business-wise, sucks
so he closed down, and now it’s a Wendy’s

there once was a boy named Trevor
who was fat, but incredibly clever 
then on one fateful day
he announced he was gay
and his family disowned him forever

I once had a beagle named Scott
my friends and I loved him a lot
but then I became poor
so I called the pet store
and returned him, for money, for pot

there once was a racist named Hugh
who ate his soup out of a shoe 
then he met my friend Syd
who gave birth to his kid
and his kid is a racist now, too

there once was a blogger named  Dave DeWitt
who loved his PC—was a slave to it 
but then he got robbed
and could no longer blog
and no one online really gave a shit