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January 12, 2009


My BFF Edward and I always like to go on these really long scary rides up in to the Hollywood Hills where we think we're going to get killed by some murderer or a Cory Haim that got loose and stare at the lights and basically Secret the shit out of our lives. Or we do what the common folk call Secreting, which is something I feel like awesome people have always done on instinct which is just basically putting out in to the Universe what is is you're going to do as if you have already done it. It's just lying positively to yourself. It's like those really sick people that you sometimes run in to in life who do really horrible things and then retell their own stories in their heads so many times that the truth is more or less wiped from their memories and all that's left is what THEY want to believe. That's just an example. I'm not some sort of freelance example writer so don't hold me accountable, but if you did like that example and you would like to hire me to write more examples of things for you, you can feel free to contact me via email.

Annnnnyyyywayyy, tonight we were Secreting and looking at LA and driving around talking about how much we love this city and the people that inspired us and we got on the topic on music videos. Ed was all "the whole point of a music video is to imagine yourself being that performer in that moment and feeling as cool as them." 1) Too deepish 2) Too trueish. 3) My hat is like a shark's fin. So we were going back and forth about all the people we used to watch and want to be and one name kept coming up over and over again: one Miss Mariah Carey aka Mrs. Cannon aka Mimi. I wanted to be her in the Always Be My Baby video (give me a denim blouse and a tire swing and I'm a fucking clam), Ed was a fan of Fantasy (That makes total sense. I can see him getting behind the carnival theme.) We both really liked Honey, which I suspect is a byproduct of our deep-rooted wish to work with the late Notorious B.I.G., whom we would only have spiritual access to via Ma$e, Diddy or another long-time member of the Bad Boy clan.

Later on we went to In and Out where Ed explained to me how to talk a police officer out of writing you unnecessary tickets. His advice? Just say "I don’t call that a loud music ticket, Officer. I was enjoying that. I call that an enjoyment ticket." Sounds good right? My cheeseburger was pretty awesome too.