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Published June 20, 2012 More Info ยป
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Published June 20, 2012

If there is one thing I hate most about myself, it's doing or saying something sarcastically, that slowly becomes very sincere.

I sometimes find greetings to be awkward, so I used to wave exuberantly with sarcastic intentions. A big back and forth like how a child might wave, with a big stupid grin on my face. Suddenly people started associating me with the wave, or even reqesting it's appearance if I greeted like a normal person. That's when I realized that not only has it become my signature, but I was enjoying myself too much to stop anyway, and that frsutrated me a lot.

It was exactly the same situation as a woman going in to get an abortion and deciding to keep the baby right before it was too late. I'm the modern day Juno.

Then I started sarcastically saying, and typing "yo" a lot. It's become very frequent, and pretty sincere as well. It's just awful. Again, I have to much fun doing it, so I know I won't cut it out of my verbal diet. At the same time, I hate myself.

Then I learned what YOLO means. I've started saying it sarcastically in conversation, but I'm worried I'll become too attached. What will happen to me I start saying it sincerely? I could stop saying YOLO, but it's just a funny word to say...No, has it begun already? "It's a funny word to say" is very suspiciously similar to "It's a fun word to say, I like it, and I'm thinking it will be my final word when I leave this world...with my death."

I guess I'm just reaching a phase in my life where I hate myself for my actions, but also have too much fun to stop. I mean I've had dumber phases, but YOLO, yo!

Shit. I just did it again, didn't I?

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