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April 04, 2016
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In his magnanimous grace, Kim Jong-un relinquished control back to us. Thank you glorious leader!

Dear visitors of Funny Or Die,

Perhaps you noticed that on Friday April 1st 2016 our website was taken over by the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea under the glorious leadership of Kim Jong-un.

Since then, control of the site has been returned to capitalist dogs Will Ferrell, Adam McKay and their assorted lackeys.

The Funny Or Die writers are sad to see our benevolent North Korean conquerors leave us. They treated us well. They fed us delicious food, of which they have plenty to go around, a surplus even! Definitely not a terrible shortage that leaves their population malnourished. Also, they all smelled like flowers.

We would like to dispel the rumor that control of the site was relinquished by the DPRK only after an elaborate rescue mission in which Will Ferrell himself acted very much like a combination of John McClane from that movie Die Hard and the hackers from that movie Hackers, parachuting into a North Korean intelligence center in order to “take over the mainframe” and “beat up many bad guys along the way” as well as “look super fucking rad while he did it,” as internet rumors have claimed. The DPRK took comedy celebrity Paul Resier hostage! I think they could handle Will Ferrell, thank you very much.

No. That is not what happened.

Rather, after creating such delightful goof videos as “The Landowner” and “You Won’t Believe These 10 Most Obedient Cats” and “How To Make A Nuclear Bomb,” the North Koreans had fulfilled their glorious mission of creating top funny comedy, and hence had no more need for our puny website. In one day, they caused more laughs worldwide than all U.S. imperialist entertainment had created combined since the release of the Dennis Rodman action-comedy vehicle Double Team (1997).

In fact, these superior funny skits created so much Earth-rumbling laughter, it was throwing the globe off its axis. The United Nations begged the DPRK to handback the site. In their endless grace, the North Koreans happily obliged.

We few remaining writers who survived the magnanimous executions which followed the literal interpretation of our website’s dictum funny or die are not posting this message under threat of future personal harm or because literally there is a semi-automatic CZ-82 pistol pressed to our temples. These words are pure and true, like the fact that Kim Jong-un does not have gout!

Virality forever,
Funny Or Die
(formerly Funny Death Choose)

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