America’s favorite detective, Inspector Gadget, is coming back to television on March 27th. Only this time, instead of the puritanical Nickelodeon, he’ll be premiering exclusively on Netflix. And you know what premium cable means — we’re finally gonna get a chance to see what his dick looks like.
Now I already know what his dick looks like ’cause we go to the same gym. But the rest of the office has no clue. So in a fun little exercise, everyone drew their best guess. Here are the results.
This is a pretty good guess but it’s wrong. It just looks like a normal person’s penis and we all know Gadget is NOT a normal person. His penis can, like, DO STUFF, ya know what I mean? I don’t know if this is TMI, but this dick sorta looks like mine, actually.
I don’t … I don’t know what this is. First off, no pubes? Inspector Gadget has pubes. Secondly, I don’t know if this was drawn from a weird perspective or whatever but his dick and balls are equal in size to his legs? How is he supposed to hunt for clues if he keeps tripping over his junk? This was a bad effort. Sorry, Jason.
WTF, Kyle. Do you really think Inspector Gadget has a Matthew Broderick dick head? Or is this some meta joke? Either way, you’ve wasted my time as well as your own. You’ve definitely never seen Gadget’s dick and TBH, I’m wondering if you’ve even see any dick.
OK, you’re either not taking this seriously and I’m mad or you are taking this seriously and I’m frightened. Where are all these hands coming from? Why is this all just one color, even the dick head? That “Tickle Tickle” at the bottom — do the hands talk? Do the BALLS talk? This is a really important article and I’m worried you’re treating it like a joke.
What is this?! Next.
Um, this is some 50 Shades of Grey shit. This is not a dick, this is a torture device. Inspector Gadget is a good guy! He has a good guy’s penis. This is like a barbed wire shaft and medieval mace head. He would rightfully be thrown in prison for using these genitals. Get your mind outta the gutter, Abby.
Well, my only real problem with this is the umbrella’s facing the wrong way? Like, if Gadget takes a piss, that’s gonna TRAP the pee not protect from it. And, like, I know Inspector Gadget’s gadgets usually backfire, but this is some Amelia Bedelia shit. Oh my god, imagine if they had sex? That kid would not stand a chance.
I love the idea of “Go Go Gadget Balls,” as if sometimes he doesn’t need/wear them. I bet this is really handy in the summer. A+ for imagination but there are too many bells and whistles with this dick.
(True story — this article was delayed two days ’cause Zack was having so much fun drawing this. He spent a lot of time on it and it shows.)
This dick is sleek as hell. I love it. It’s not accurate AT ALL but I admire how aerodynamic it is. This is a dick that would be really good with wind resistance. It’d be cool if Inspector Gadget had the 11” dick this depicts, but it’s not true. I don’t even think 11” dicks actually exist.
Yes, this one’s correct.
Matthew Broderick–less Inspector Gadget pic via DeviantArt artist bonjourmonami