Mon: Fried kangaroo pouch with pesto sauce.
Tue: Caramel-flavored ostrich neck covered in garlic oil and lima bean skins shaped liked Washington crossing the Delaware.
Wen: (since the “D” in Wednesday is silent I’ve begun a crusade to change the spelling to Wensday.) Baked bananas stuffed with anchovies and tomato-flavored pigeon soup.
Thu: Fried dwarf ears smothered in honey-glazed mushrooms and cherry-flavored chicken gizzards topped with cauliflower and peanut butter marinade, and broiled caterpillar thighs flambe'd with California barking spider DNA.
Fri: Chinchilla ankles.
Sat: Steak flavored meat product with lemony soy beans and curdled goose droppings.
Sun: Candy-coated elf toes and cream of kiwi soup.