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If you hadn't heard, Eddie Murphy has been tapped as the host of the 2012 Academy Awards. This is wonderful news for many reasons, most importantly being that Eddie Murphy is the best and we need to be reminded of this. And while we're sure he has plenty in store for the gig, here are 13 things we're hoping he pulls out during the ceremony. 

  • There's a performance by Sexual Chocolate.
  • He wears a leather jumpsuit. 
  • The song played during the "In Memorium" is "Party all the Time."
  • He shows up as Norbit and says "Fuck You" to the crowd, before dropping the microphone and leaving during the opening monologue.
  • He invites Joe Piscopo to sit in the front row and repeatedly rips on Joe Piscopo.
  • After ripping on Joe Piscopo for two hours, Joe Piscopo is featured prominently in the "In Memorium."
  • Every presenter is accompanied by the theme song to Beverly Hills Cop.
  • Every presenter is Judge Reinhold.
  • Bowfinger is given an honorary Oscar for not getting its due. 
  • Dan Aykroyd is asked to host the Razzies and then, based on their respective performances, two old men exchange a dollar.
  • He does 10 hours of standup to make up for lost time.
  • He kills it.
  • Seriously. He fucking kills it.
That's not too much to ask, right?

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