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Wednesday before my "manly” softball game, I got out of my car and looked into this white guy’s yard (pictured). I know this is a white man’s yard because only white guys are dumb enough to think birds can work the spicket.  

I also noticed that the way the light shines down on this particular yard sink it’s sort of a white trash beacon of hope for this predominantly black neighborhood. (As if there were more yard sinks (There probably are)). It says to the people; it’s okay to be white and let your neighbors see your true stupidity. 

The only way this guy could possibly make this worse  better is to put a lawn deer, a minimum of 3 old broken down lawn mowers, and a set of Jarts in the yard. 

I imagine that the fence was put up after the fact because I’m sure the area’s homeless became aware of the free watering/shower hole in this guy’s yard.  I’m sure a few nights of homeless sink shower sex in the front yard will lead anyone to put up a boundary around such an artistically landscaped lawn piece.   

Look at the over lapping of the black plastic fence holding all of the mulch in that doesn’t allow weeds to grow but lets just enough garden plastic to stick out of the mulch that screams: this is how the Romans would have done it. Not to mention the beautiful golf course level grass mowing detailing how white trash this yard is.  Only white trash have shitty lawn ornaments and tightly trimmed grass (Trust me I know this to be fact).

Only peering into the background at the row of houses makes me wonder how many piles of shit this guy still finds in his outside sink.  That is the only possible way his lawn sink would still be white.  The owner manages to take a break from the lawn Jarts and cutting the grass to bleach the fuck out of his sink because some one pooped in it and he still wants to lap some water out of it after he gets winded from playing Jarts.

After my game I found out they were actually renovating the yard and there was a toilet, mirror and tile. Then I felt like a dick. Enjoy your weekend you white honkys or even if you aren’t.  I know I will enjoy mine by making a pilgrimage to the sacred white trash beacon of hope. 


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