Deborah! Oh my god, I LOVE your bathroom. Is that awkward to say? Oh, I'm sorry if that's awkward to say. But you know what, screw social standards, because I have to got to say, I lovelovelove your bathroom.
I'll sit down in a second! Yes, I know my dinner is getting cold. No, Deborah, I love your veal parmigiana. Okay, but hold on, I have got to tell everyone about your bathroom. Stop being so bashful!
Ladies. Deborah does not have one, not two, but three bowls of potpurri in her bathroom. I know what you're thinking--that's crazy! That is going to smell way too strongly of pine! But actually it smells like just the right amount of pine. I don't know how she did it, but Deborah pulled off a three-pot-purri bathroom and let me tell you, it is divine.
Are you laughing, Daphne? Because I'm telling you, go pee. Go pee right now and see if you can keep laughing. You will be in awe.
Deborah, I love what you have done with the tiles. The light blue to darker blue gradient really enhances the underwater theme of the room. And the hand towels--how often can you find a nice hand towel that matches? You must have driven to so many Kohl's. I can just see you behind the wheel of your car on a Sunday morning with an iced latte in hand. That is a beautiful journey.
Also, I know it's not okay for me to do this, but I investigated your shower and tub. I know! I know that makes me a bitch! That is absolutely something that is not okay to do. But Deborah--Deborah, stop screaming. Deborah! I am trying to compliment you! Deborah, you have an incredible selection of bath salts. That's all I was going to say! I'm ruining this party? No, Deborah, your bathroom is ruining this dinner party.
You know what, I've said my fill. Someone please pour me some more wine. No? Alexis? No? Daphne? Kelly? Janice? Deborah?
You know what, you're all right. I am drunk. I'm drunk on a vice called Deborah's bathroom.