- He was the antagonist in “It’s The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown”.
- Fat people love him *cough* Chris Christie, my Grandmother.
- He’s Caucasian (every successful President is a white male).
- He’s a ladies man. He can get any woman he wants… that isn’t from America.
- John Oliver has a Trump Fetish. If John Oliver likes you, you know you’ve made it.
- He hates women. Cause he’s a closeted homosexual (every great President is *cough* Bill Clinton, he blew more then just a saxophone).
- He wants to get rid of Illegal Immigrants. Thank God, I just can’t wait to start mowing my lawn again. Please deport them, I beg you.
- He’s great with his hands (cause he’s a closeted homosexual).
- He looks like a retarded Muppet.
- He wipes his ass with money. I wipe mine with nickels, because I’m poor.