First they were turned down by the Republicans.
Then they were turned down by the Democrats.
Now Earl Jr. and Tom Rogers have found a home with the Abdicratic party.
Tuesday members of the Abdicratic party voted for Earl Jr. and Tom Rogers to represent them in November.
“I have always considered myself most in line with the views of the Abdicrats,” Earl Jr. said. “This is a natural fit.”
As the ticket of the Abdicratic party, Earl Jr. and Tom Rogers will not appear on the ballots of any state.
Tom Rogers, Earl Jr’s vice-presidential candidate, asserts that will not be an issue.
“Hell! With who we got on the ballot, people are looking for a write-in!” Rogers said. “We’ve been getting the word out and motivating the base.”
When asked to elaborate Rogers said that he did not actually understand what “motivating the base” meant, and we should refer any more questions to one of his consultants.
The Abdicratic party was established in part to create a 3 party system and in part to simply “shake-up” the political scene, according to a spokesperson.
“So far we have been highly unsuccessful at both,” said the spokesperson. “We do not anticipate that to change merely because of the celebrity of our ticket, but here’s hoping!”