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June 04, 2010


Those Were Different Times Contest #62

Introducing: "Six Million Dollar Man Hear 4 Exciting Christmas Adventures" by whoever made this.

7. "And not one of them involve that Lindsay Wagner douche."

6. Great, for the last 40 years I've had nothing but mundane Christmas adventures. This ought to spice things up.

5. There's nothing that screams Christmas like a slow motion "yule log" at sixty miles an hour.

4. Yep, this cover won't have the kids waking up and screaming.

3. “Christmas Lights" is the sentimental tale of Steve's cyborg-brain going haywire and his putting packs of cigarettes into the stockings of a ward full of cancer-kids

2. This record wasn't a hit because in all 4 stories, he gets killed.

1. Evidently, Lee Major's solution to the old "How does santa visit every house in the world in one night?" problem is simple: Visit as many houses as you can, then nuke the rest