This one time

So this one time about 6 years back i OD on pills at work and had to go to the ER room to get that sh*t pumped out of me like a ture dumba*s. Found this pills on the side of the road doing community service that my so called friends handed to me. Haven't done a pill since.

Once got busted smoking weed in high school but lucky for me it was the music teacher that busted me so he let me go.

Once got drunk as sh*t with my brothers and i puked all over my parents bed and all over the house. That moonshine will get yah.

Jump into a fire once to get a "tat" and then the next day i went dancing a some club with some chick in a wheelchair but she was hot.

belly floped a fosball table. Bust out a tooth and got mad black and blue marks all over my body that night. But that is not the first hard fall i have taking and it will not be that last.

Once told my friends if i ever go to a gay bar i would shit my pants so that night i went see some cage fights and afterwards the people i was with went to a gay so after we got back to there to place to crash out for the night i sh*t my pants in my sleep. So watch what you say people.

Once ate a sh*t load of magic mushrooms on the night in my parents basement when i was 15. An that was the night i meet my first love she was 18 and homeless at time. An ever since then my mind has never been the same but not in a good way at all.

Drop out of High School and now am still living with my parents like a sad little man.  But i did get my GED.

When i was a little kid i poured gay on myself and then as a teen i used to huff gas. An that is why am retarded now. Had LD classes and everyting but still droped out of school.

Yes i have black out from drinking at least 5 times in my life. An that is way i need to just stick with the light beer.

Once ate 6 hits of LSD in one night and watched my friends place flood. Never really came down from all that tripping out back in the day.  An this is why i stick to weed.

Got busted smoking a bowl at work once.

Ran away to Austin T.X as a teen to see my x the one from the mushroom story. Not a good idea at all my peeps.

as a kid  i put a garbage can on firer that was in the house then put it out by myself and acted like i didn't do anything.

i have been arrested for open cans on a beach, once for trespassing, once for bring drunk in public, once on X-Mas for playing music to loud and once for mouthing off. But lets not get into this crap ok.

"An this isn't even the bad stuff."