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First of all, stop worrying! Relaaaaax. The state of our nation is, in a word, EXPLOSIVE. President Obama dropped a bomb last night...

Aaaaaand only one old, white, painfully awkward Republican seemed kind of scared. The rest of the nation seemed pretty excited, particularly this man:

...who supports both our President's effort to wage the minimum wage AND a separate independent iniative out of Brooklyn for Mustache-related tax credits.

Some Americans are neither uncomfortable nor excited. They're just bored.

Bored in Congress.

In Congress dying of boredom (Kerry):

In Congress licking their lips (Grandpa Joe):

In Congress rolling their eyes...(Boehner):

...or touching their infected eye repeatedly (Vice President Biden):

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Infections  and boredom aside, they are in Congress chiefly to villanously plot their inevitable world domination (Schumer)!:

Above all, the state of our union is tolerant! As evinced by Washington's tolerance of Ted Nugent's presence.

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And his totally comfortable body language toward the gay man seated next to him:

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If you're still feeling less-than-confident about the state of our nation, just watch this video of the Republican response, as told by Senator Marco Rubio of Florida (courtesy of Joe Mande):

America, the cotton-mouthed. 

 

(Gifs & pics via Gawker, NY Mag, Buzzfeed, The Atlantic Wire, the Global Post and Tumblr.)

 

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