What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
About 45 lbs.
What do you call a dog with only 2 legs?
Why did the man put his money in the freezer?
He wanted cold hard cash!
What would you call two banana skins?
A pair of slippers.
Why did the elephant eat the candle?
He wanted a light snack!
What exam do young witches have to pass?
A spell-ing test!
What are two things you cannot have for breakfast?
Lunch and dinner.
What gets wetter the more it dries?
How do you catch a squirrel?
Climb a tree and act like a nut!
Yo mama so stupid she went to the orthodontist to get a blue tooth!
You're so dumb you took a ruler to bed to see how long you slept!
You're so dumb, when you had a brainstorm it was just a drizzle.
You're so dumb when someone told you that we live in the Milky Way.. you thought it was the candy bar.