Episode VII : Ghosts of the Jedi
STAR WARS MONTAGE
There is a rapid fire montage of scenes from the six existing Star Wars films.
Star Wars. Generations have grown
up watching these beloved films; now
come three new adventures for a generation
that hasn’t been born yet.
We see the classic crawl, Episode VII, Ghosts of the Jedi, basically explaining that the Empire was beaten thirty years ago and Luke Skywalker has spent all that time trying to rebuild the Jedi.
YES! George Lucas, Creator… um, I mean
Kathleen Kennedy, Associate Producer of
some of the greatest films of the last
thirty years, and The Disney Company, give
you three new films, about the same story
you heard a long, long time ago …
INT. JEDI TEMPLE HALLWAY
The ghosts of Qui Non Jin and Anakin are training, squatting down on the floor.
QUI NON JIN
Anakin! Concentrate! Remember, you are
a ghost. You don’t have a body anymore.
All you have is your spirit. You have to
take everything you have and concentrate
on the tip of your finger.
Anakin grimaces as he holds up his finger concentrating with extreme strain.
There is a copper penny with Yoda’s face on it on the floor; a New Republic Penny. Anakin places his finger next to the penny and continues to strain. We hear the unchained melody theme from the movie Ghost.
Oh, my love, my darling, I hunger for,
your touch …
Star Wars: Episode Seven. Ghosts of
After seconds of effort, Anakin manages to move the penny a few millimeters.
INT. JEDI COUNCIL CHAMBERS – DAY
A fifty four year old Jedi Master Luke Skywalker enters, looking pensive and concerned.
Troubled, are you?
The ghosts of all the old Jedi suddenly materialize in their old seats.
Uh, guys? Can I have a little
INT. CORUSCANT APARTMENT – DAY
A fifty four year old Leia goes from room to room looking for something. A seventy five year old Han Solo is resting in his Lazy Boy recliner.
Han. Han honey, have you seen my
Leia, you’ve got a million brushes.
I don’t know where you put them. Heck,
the only thing I’ve found in the last
ten years is this thing.
Han reaches down under the end table next to the recliner and pulls up the crystal skull from Indiana Jones IV.
INT. JEDI MUSEUM
The ghost of Mace Windu is in front of a display case showing all the Jedi lightsabers. His arm always goes through the case as he tries to grab his purple lightsaber. He stops, gives up and turns around, as crestfallen as the crazy subway ghost.
Man, I’d give anything to get my
INT. CORUSCANT APARTMENT – DAY
Old Han is sleeping on the couch as Leia kneads a ball of clay. Suddenly Guinan opens the door.
Leia! Leia! You gotta listen to me child!
GUINAN! Guinan, what are you doing
here? I thought you were supposed to be
on the Enterprise G.
Never mind, Baby. Never mind. This is
Important. I gotta tell you something.
Leia. Leia. Leia girl, you are in trouble.
Guinan, when have I NOT been in trouble?
Tell me something I don’t know.
Damn, you’re cold!
Do me a favor, take that Hula Hoop out
of your hat.
EXT. TATOOINE DESERT – DAY
A set of legs in black pants runs across the desert. A few seconds later they are followed by a black blob with a red head. It’s the ghost of Darth Maul trying to catch up to his legs.
INT. JEDI TEMPLE
Obi Wan Kenobi watches Qui Non and Anakin as Anakin tries to move a feather on the ground. An over cooked sausage crawling on the ground gets his attention.
Obi Wan Kenobi! I’ve waited a long time
for this. I finally found you.
OBI WAN KENOBI
Who are you? What are you?
It’s me! General Greivous! Now I can
have my revenge!
OBI WAN KENOBI
Where’s the rest of you?
You burned what was left of my body!
What did you think I’d look like?!
EXT. JEDI TEMPLE BALCONY – DAY
A fifty four year old Jedi Master Luke Skywalker looks out over the city. The ghost of Emperor Palpatine appears next to him.
Ah, Young Skywalker. After years of effort
I have returned to the mortal realm. Soon
I will regain my rightful place and my
revenge will be complete!
Luke raises his hands and blue lightning shoots out of his fingers. The Emperor screams as the lightning surrounds him and fades him back into the realm of the dead.
Didn’t see that coming, did you?
INT. CORUSCANT APARTMENT – NIGHT
Leia places a lump of clay on the potter’s wheel as the theme from Ghost continues. Seventy five year old Han Solo comes up behind her and starts caressing her. They snuggle and cuddle, then Han reaches over to his side and grabs an oxygen mask. He places it over his mouth and inhales deeply. After a few breaths Han places the mask back on its hook on the wall.
EXT. CORUSCANT ROOFTOP – NIGHT
We see the ghost of a Jedi singing the last part of the Ghost theme on the rooftop.
I need your love. Oh, I need your love.
Star Wars: Episode Seven: Ghosts of
the Jedi. Coming in two thousand fifteen.
No matter what you think.