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Published November 10, 2008 More Info »
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Published November 10, 2008
I had to go to Walgreens to pick up a prescription Sunday night. It is lovely in there this time of year, Christmas Decorations abound, Christmas Muzak, and the smell of Pine-sol. After waiting for an hour and hearing an instrumental version of 12 days of Christmas 57 times, I came up with new lyrics for an old classic.....On a Sunday Night at Walgreens you might see:Twelve Bums HummingEleven Emos KypingTen bottles seepingNine  Drag Queen PrancingEight lubes for milkingSeven Rings for swimmingSix  Sluts a-layingFive creams for stingsFour Rat TurdsThree Mexi-kinsTwo Dykes in loveand A Customer with an IVin case you forgot them, Here are the original 12 itemsOn the twelfth day of Christmas,My True Love sent to me:Twelve drummers drumming,Eleven pipers piping,Ten lords a-leaping,Nine ladies dancing,Eight maids a-milking,Seven swans a-swimming,Six geese a-laying,Five golden rings,Four calling birds,Three French hens,Two turtle doves,And a partridge in a pear tree!