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CrossFit — It seems like it’s everywhere these days. It also seems really complicated. Not to worry. Here’s an easy-to-follow guide to the basic CrossFit exercises to get you started.


Kettlebell Chop Lunges

In rack position, hold a kettlebell in your right hand with your left hand on top of the right. Lunge-step with your left leg, twist to your left, and lower the bell to your left hip. Step back and return the bell to the starting position. Repeat for at least 30 seconds, and then switch sides.

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Tabata Push-ups

Ready to get the blood pumping? Get down in the classic push-up position and do as many push-ups as you can in 20 seconds. Then rest for 10 seconds before you do another 20 seconds of push-ups. Do this for eight sets.

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Squats

Warmed up yet? With a neutral back, slowly lower your body into a squatted position with your cellphone held straight out in front of you. Or, if you have a chair and computer, assume the fully seated position and turn your device on.

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Logins

Once your internet browser is launched, precision and dexterity are the main keys to successfully typing in your login and password to each of your social media accounts.

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Snap & Uploads

It is important to take photos at CrossFit to share. Aim for hundreds of reps daily.

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Posts

Remember: CrossFit is just exercise until you tell everyone you know you are doing CrossFit. Advanced users can try throwing in a creative hashtag, like “#CrossFit.”

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Chasedowns

Set up by telling friends, classmates, and co-workers about CrossFit until they begin to avoid and even run from you because of it. Now try to catch them and convince them of the benefits of the Paleo Diet.

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Box Jumps, Burpees, Hang Snatches, etc. (Optional)

If you really want to do more, jump around and flail a lot and call it something kind of weird. Just make sure you remember to tell everyone about it.

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Cool Down

Remember to stretch, especially your mouth. You are going to be talking about CrossFit more than you have ever talked about anything in your life.

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Illustrations by Brad Jonas

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