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September 02, 2008


Hangover #16,254 Edition


I watched some of the Republican National Convention on TV. Man, that convention center is filled with so many white old people, I thought I was watching the National Bingo Championships. If you really want renewable energy, reflect sunlight off of those white faces and harness the energy. In one speech, the actor, Fred Thompson (I guess not a celebrity) was going into such detail about Senator McCain’s heroic time in Vietnam. His battles and his sad capture. I gotta say, McCain went through a lot. He was tortured and held captive for 5 years in a time where most young men are exploring their future. I have a tremendous amount of respect for Senator McCain’s service but I’m not sure why that has anything to do with being President 40 years later. He was strong, he was brave and he is every bit of a patriot as anyone serving in the Armed Forces today. He suffered greatly in an unjust, unwinnable war but yet he wants to have the present day soldier fight to the death which cannot be won. I’m not talking about bravery and I’m not talking about military strength, but if you cannot define victory then you cannot attain it. President Bush said that when the Iraqi’s want us to leave, we will leave. Well, the government that was formed through the democracy we set up has asked us to leave and we should leave. You cannot ask for a more graceful exit than that. Unless of course that’s not what the war was about: (cough) oil. (cough) money. (cough) Weird misogynist ideologues who thrive on punishment and cruelty (cough).

Anyway, if you want me to vote for McCain, let me know what qualifies him today to be President, not what he did 40 years ago. With all due respect.


You Gotta See:

You gotta see "The Sweet Smell of Success," a classic noir from 1957 starring Tony Curtis as a two bit press agent trying to get in good with the prominent celebrity columnist J.J. Hunseker played by Burt Lancaster. It’s gritty and the dialogue snaps like a Slim Jim.

When I was 23 living in NYC, my roommate, Lars, and I saw this movie at the Film Forum on Houston Street as a part of the NYC Noir Festival. We also saw a double feature of Rear Window and Lost Weekend. The Film Forum is awesome and truly a NY landmark. They always played awesome movies even if the popcorn was dull and cold and sitting in their seat was sitting on an old lady’s lap. I miss living in NYC. You can walk everywhere and it is a place that quickly becomes your home. When you are in your early 20’s, New York City is not the kind of place you try to “Break into” like Los Angeles or Washington, D.C., but rather, NYC is a city of opportunity waiting to be plucked by anyone who takes the time to reap it’s Harvest. And the cool thing about the city, is that it doesn’t get weaker when you pluck from it it’s riches, but the city grows stronger along with you.

The poet Claude Mckay wrote these words that, in my mind, always connected me to New York City as a young man struggling to find a voice, a beer, and hopefully a girl.

"Although she feeds me bread of bitterness,/ And sinks into my throat her tiger's tooth,/ Stealing my breath of life,/ I will confess I love this cultured hell that tests my youth!

Enough of this lovemaking, here’s a clip of Sydney Falco delivering some urgent news to JJ Hunsecker at the famed Jockey Club in NYC. It may start slow, but hopefully, you’ll get into it.




Have you ever seen this ad? I’m addicted.


Inspired by this ad, I have an idea for Red Lobster’s Shrimp night.

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

There’s another parody of that song that I absolutely love by Detroit Octane, if you haven’t seen it, here it is. And if you have, watch it again because it’s amazing and it will put you in a wonderful mood… even if you’re at a funeral.

See more funny videos at Funny or Die