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Published September 11, 2008

...if Moby slipped Shane Macgowan a cheeky li'l' Rohypnol, and had his slightly odd way with him? 

Yeah you have.

Batboy is what would happen.

Mind you, I'd stick my neck out and say that drugs are like a piss in the ocean when it comes to Shane, you could probably wax his gooch without a flinch. I mean, have you seen him lately? Catatonics are more vibrant. The Grim Reaper must be held up in traffic or something, because that bloke's hour glass is emptier than Poland.

So then, Rock, Paper, Scissors seems to have touched a nerve. It looks likes we've all been on the wrong end of those rock-wrapping bastards, or more frustratingly, the cheats that decide to bring their own weapons along.

I mean, there's not much more annoying than pulling out a legitimate pair of scissors, only to be hit with chainsaw. Yeah, because that's why the game's called Anything, right? I mean, it's not like they specify. 

We've all met them. I have, you have. Harry Truman certainly has...

...at the Big Berlin Divvy Up.

Seriously, I reckon I've stumbled across the secret Cold War Catalyst. What else can you turn to when you can't decide who gets the moustache comb factory? Politics? Pah!

Truman: "One, two, three. Rock"

Stalin: "Scissors. Dammit. Two out of three?"

Truman: "One, two, three. Scissors....what's that?"

Stalin: "Er...tank."

Truman: "Tank? Is that allowed?"

Stalin: "In America, you play like little girls. In Russia, we play like men. Tank!"

Truman: "Little girls, eh? Ok...two tanks!"

Stalin:  "Missile!"

J.F.K.: "Blockade!"

Stalin: "Who the hell are you? Cuba!"

J.F.K.:  "Cuba's not a weapon."

Stalin: *Evil snigger* "It is now."

Meh, maybe not. It'd be funny to go back in time and find out though. Mind you, not as funny as going back and wafting a fart into Hilter's face, just to see his reaction.

I'm guessing hitmen would be involved somewhere along the line.

 

 

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