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April 28, 2015
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Chipotle Will No Longer Use Genetically Modified Ingredients, Eliminating Some Of Your Favorite Menu Items

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Starting Monday, every one of Chipotle’s more than 1,800 restaurants will be free of genetically altered ingredients. Chipotle will be the first major restaurant chain in America to completely eliminate genetically modified organisms (popularly known as G.M.O.s) from all of their food (excluding sodas that may contain G.M.O. corn sweeteners and some of its meat and dairy supplies come from animals that were fed some G.M.O. grains).

This is great news for American food and a big step in holding large chain restaurants accountable for what they are providing their customers, but what does this news mean practically? Well, when you step up to order your Monday burrito next week you’ll still see all of the normal offerings, but those aware of the lesser known menu items that only appear in small print at the bottom of Chipotle’s menu board might notice that some of options have disappeared.

Here’s a list of the G.M.O. riddled Chipotle dishes that will no longer be available but could possibly start showing up at other, less responsible fast food restaurants.


Giant Headed Chicken Burrito Bowl
On a bed of cilantro-lime rice, black beans, and roasted chili-corn salsa, our famous marinated and grilled chicken with a big fat head sitting there right on top.

Chips and Guacamole and Basketball-Size Lime Wedge

Vegetarian Fajita Burrito
Cilantro-lime rice, pinto beans, roasted onions and green peppers that are so bright green that they can light up a dark, windowless, closet, wrapped in a corn flour tortilla.

Tomatillo-Red Chili Salsa
Contains 8,000% Daily Value of Vitamin C

Steak Burrito
Cilantro-lime rice, choice of black or pinto beans, and adobo marinated and grilled short loin steak that, while it is technically the “short” loin, this cow’s loin was longer than a church window, all wrapped in a flour tortilla.

Tortilla Chips
Made from corn that could smash through a pick-up truck’s windshield.

Barbacoa Tacos
Brown rice, pinto beans, and your choice of salsas mixed with spicy, braised, shredded beef from a cow that always felt like it’s body was too big for its skin until the cows skin split open because it had too much insides, in three soft flour taco shells.

Roasted Chili-Corn Salsa
The corn has little legs on it and it’ll run away if you don’t eat it fast enough.

Three-eyed Carnitas Burrito
Rice, beans and pork (This pig had three eye balls and the machine that seperates, braises, and shreds the pork from the pig is only designed to pick out two eyeballs so odds are there’s a little bit of NON-TOXIC eyeball floating around in there), all wrapped in a heated flour tortilla.

Coca-Cola
Carbonated Tap Water, E150D food coloring, E952 sugar substitute, Acesulfame potassium, Aspartame, Orthophosphoric Acid, Citrics Acid, Sodium Benzoate, and heaps and heaps of genetically modified corn syrup! (note:Coca-Cola still available at Chipotle and other places including nearly every school in America here children grow up and learn habits that will stay with them for the rest of their lives)

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