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4 Funny Votes
2 Die Votes
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Published April 14, 2011


From: http://mylifeoncraigslist.wordpress.com/

OMG, this sounds crazy.  Tell you what i will clean it for a cup of coffee and maybe make a new friend.  That is if it is even cleanable.  You will need a bottle of white vinegar and some long pipe cleaners for me to do it.  I live out in weaverville.  If your serious, get in touch and i will try to get over to fix it as soon as possible so long as you are not further away than XXXX
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Soak parts that can be submerged in a sink with hot water and 2 cups vinegar. As far as not wanting to do the nooks and crannies, Q-tips and vinegar… just suck it up and do it. The amount of time you just spent reading this email and writing that post you probably could have cleaned it by now. Only people who have the money to buy new coffee pots have the luxury to say they just don’t want to do it themselves. And whatever you are going to pay someone to do the job, just spend on another coffee pot if it is that big a deal…
Just saying…
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Thank You! That’s  what I needed this morning.
Have a good one!
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lol, it probably takes more time to create this add then to actually clean the thing. ?
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I must say this is one of the most interesting posts I have ever seen on Craig’s
List.

I am assuming this is a drip coffee maker?  There is a product called Dip-It (I
have bought it at grocery stores) specifically designed to clean coffee makers.
Soak the cone and carafe and rinse, the stuff is amazing.  When they are clean,
run some white vinegar in water through the machine, then run plain water
through.  The rest of the cleaning is cosmetic, spritz and wipe.  If the actual
labor takes 10 minutes, i would be surprised.

I am curious what you cansider a reasonable offer for this task.  Would you pay
someone the amount you earn an hour, plus expenses and a premium?  That seems
fair. After all, this is a simple task anyone could do, including you, but you
want someone to go out of their way to do it for you. If someone does do it for
you, you should respect their time as much as you respect your own.

Good luck
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Dear Concerned Coffee Maker Owner,
I will clean your coffee maker and one other appliance of your choice for $50. Is it cone or flat bottom? I ask because I also have some flat bottom filters that I will throw in for free.
Thank you,
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Hello;
My name is XXXX and I have experience cleaning coffee makers! I am fairly intelligent, efficient, and interested in *odd* jobs. Yeah, it’s kind of a sketchy request, but I’ll be missed if I go missing so I’m not too concerned.
Does the thing definitely work? Like, is it willing to make coffee but too frumpy to do it?
I’m not really sure what to ask as payment for this; I’m a POOR college student living outside of town or I would do it for free. It does seem silly, but I’m willing and able.
Thanks and happy Wednesday,
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Your ad was very funny and you should be writing a blog. You have tremendous potential!
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How many replays have you received already?  Go to that favorite coffee stop of yours and buy some of there professional cleaner.  let it soak overnight.  If you really don’t want to I’ll do it, but your going to meet me outside ad I’ll bring it back sparkling in a couple of hours.  I still suggest you buy a bottle of the powder cleaner to keep at your office to let soak in your pot over the weekend, every weekend so you never have to face the funk at the bottom of the pot again.

I think it’s awesome you know how you do and don’t want to spend your time, I wouldn’t call it lazy at all.
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Just fill it almost full of white vinegar and add a little baking soda to it, in a sink preferably. After the initial erruption, plug it in and turn it on to allow the solutiion to complete the journey, it will clean out nooks and crannies you didnt even know you had!! Two or three pots of clear water run through it after that, (you will know how many it takes by what comes out of it) and viola!! a useable appliance!!
You sound just about crazy enough for me to work for, got any long term forty hour a week assignments laying around there?? Best Regards
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why  don’t you just go to walmart and buy a new one instead of paying someone to clean that one   t
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so, i wouldn’t say this is lazy….maybe enterprising is a better way to put it. i’m not interested in cleaning it, but just wanted to put out there that you’d be probably saving time and money to just pay for a new one at big lots (couldn’t be more than 10). sure, this defeats the purpose of buying at goodwill, but so does your proposal. then you could donate that coffee maker to, like, laber ready, or someone that would be tickled pink to have it, and clean it…pure genius i know. just a thought. take it or leave it. good luck.
one,
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This is the best job posting ever. Seriously? I’ll clean it! I think $20 is fair. I am a very meticulous cleaner and am obsessed with keeping my coffee pot clean. I even clean my mom’s whenever I visit her, because I think the coffee tastes better that way. You don’t need a lot of fancy cleaning supplies. Lemon/lime juice, baking soda, salt.

Let me know.
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Where is your office/what area is it in? If it’s not too out of the way and depending when you want it done I’ll do it for ten bucks. I like projects lol.
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Hi! My name is XXXX. I’m a 24 year old guy who is sane, fun and would like to talk more about cleaning your coffee maker for you! Your add made me laugh so I thought that I might see if you still need someone to do that for you. I can be there at anytime, and do not expect a ridiculous amount of money even if its gro-nasty!

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So, I hope I’m not wasting too much of your time (or mine) in replying to this but mostly I wanted to thank you for brightening my day after all the B.S. and scam stuff I’ve muddled through on here today. Just curious…any takers yet?

Hah! Hilarious.

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Put a clean coffee filter in the basket and fill the reservoir with vinegar. When it’s about half way through turn off the coffeemaker and let it sit for about 15 minutes. Turn it back on and let the rest of the vinegar run through. Run clean water through a couple of times and you’ll have a clean coffeemaker. Just wash off the outside and you’re done
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You must really love your coffee!
Dude, I am up for this! I love to see a before and after project.
When and where?
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Hello,

Cleaning gritty gounds from cracks and crevasses happens to be one of my few known specialties, so let us see what you could do for me in exchange for this service. A complement? I really enjoy Kava but spending five dollars on a cup is ridiculous. I propose a Kava root tincture or something of the sort for the vessel of caffeine to be pristine.

LMKwhat you think.

Thanks,
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go to amazon, order the
Proctor-Silex 43571 Automatic Drip Coffeemaker
price – $30.73, get the free super-saver shipping, have it delivered to your office and put the goodwill coffee maker in the lost & found or the goodwill donation box and consider it a good will donation.  viola!  problem solved with the least amount of effort and a good deed.    seriously.
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I am writing with the slim hope that the coffee maker that you paid five dollars for at Goodwill is the same one that my ex-girlfriend disposed of without my approval several months ago. A description: off-white (probably originally true white), plastic with a glass pot that has a black plastic lid; badly battered and noisy when used. The key detail is the black plastic lid with the off-white plastic body– if I could remember the brand name it would help, but believe me– I have never seen another model with this color scheme (and I have looked through junk shops for this machine extensively). You claim that while it is sort of dirty, it is not really, really dirty.  That sounds exactly like my coffee maker! I don’t know if you have tried running the machine yet– the easiest way to clean a coffee maker, by the way, is to simply run it using only distilled water several times (without coffee filter and coffee, of course)– the hot water and steam helps to sterilize and break down residual build up.  If you have not yet done this, give it a try– and if it is actually the coffee maker I’m looking for it will make a soft, almost yelping sort of noise, like a six-week old schnauzer lost in the underbrush, during the brewing stage. This noise is very quiet and if you are playing any music or even breathing heavily you may miss it entirely.  The best thing to do is to squat down next to the machine and listen attentively, about 18? away from the base.
If you suspect the coffee maker that you obtained may be the one I’ve described above please don’t keep getting people to try and clean it! They might not know what they are doing and only damage it, or, worse, make it more dirty. The expensive, stainless steel edifice that my ex replaced my cheap plastic coffee maker with makes horrible, european-tasting coffee, and even other cheaper machines I’ve tried recently haven’t been able to approximate that “road trip through the Southwest early morning truck stop taste” that this unique machine consistently provided.  My breakfasts await new cheer: if the machine is a match, I am perfectly willing to pay you six dollars.
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To Whom It May Concern,
I am on a serious job search, and I am well overqualified to perform the tasks mentioned in your description.  While I am not intimidated by the prospects of responding to what some may call a questionable posting/job offer, I am a little weary of people who use phrases like “nooks and crannies” as they may lead to uncomfortable scenarios in the readers’ imagination.  But I digress as I guess that is more a question for jungian analysis and perhaps there is no need to project my fears into the situation.  At any rate you have reassured that the work environment will be well lit, and thus ruled out the possibility of sweat-shop-like working conditions.  Having said that, I must add that I have no opposition to the prospect of sweating while working as I have worked for years as a home-builder, built MRI rooms for hospitals and cleaned my friends’ coffee maker last week.
It just so happens that your ad has been placed with an impeccable sense of timing.  As I am sure you are aware by now, there is a city-wide water-quality alert and I happen to be very thirsty as I write this.  You of course are offering a beverage as payment which is a value-added benefit.  Speaking of benefits, I take my brew with honey and almond milk, and don’t try paying with some cheaper brand like folgers.  If you can make that happen, then we have a deal.
My schedule is really slammed full right now, so if you give my secretary a call, we might be able to fit you in-between some of my other projects such as inventing energy-efficient home-heating solutions, brokering deals with foreign dignitaries to improve working conditions and environmental impact and negotiating with crackpot dictators like kim-jong-ill  regarding their use of faulty can-openers that may or may not contain lead paint from china.
Sincerely,
Sir-CleansPotsAlot
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New coffee makers start at $15 without having to drag someone else’s dignity down.

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