John_Travolta.jpgConfusion in the streets of Hollywood this morning as a man who, as one bystander put it, "look just like mother fucking dude from "Grease" but a whole lot fatter," actually turned out to be John Travolta. 


As word began to spread throughout the gathering crowd that, "That dude don't look like Jon Travolta... that's just John Travolta," the throng of tourists quickly put away their iPhones and cameras and went about their day. 


One father of three from Falls Church, Virginia exclaimed, "It's a rare and amazing thing to see somebody who looks like somebody famous.  It's another thing entirely to see John Travolta.  If I wanted to see John Travolta I would rent 'Broken Arrow,' but then I'd have to watch 'Broken Arrow' so fuck it." 


His wife added, "Yeah, how you gonna be the worst actor in a movie with Howie Long in it, anyway?"  She then recalled, "At first we all thought it was Val Kilmer having a stroke, and then someone said that it might be Steven Segal without his ponytail hairpiece on... but I thought it was probably Kevin Spacey passing a kidney stone." 


When Travolta acknowledged the crowd and reached out to sign an autograph he was told by a vacationer to, "Get your Goddamn hands off of my map of the stars!"  Nick Cage's face could not be reached for comment.