I’m happily married but if I was young and starting out to find a girl I would prefer a big ole’ ugly girl.

There are many reasons.

First of all, I’m an ugly guy. Why would an ugly guy want to go with a beautiful girl? If you got married and had children granted the children might look a little less ugly than me, that’s if I married a beautiful woman.

But the children would probably never be as good looking as they might have been—because of me. You think I want them to hold that against me all their lives?

There are others reasons.

A beautiful woman knows she is beautiful. This alone can cause plenty of problems. How does she know she’s beautiful? She goes to the market and to the produce section and the men there stop feeling the fruit and stare—at her. Struck dumb as though a deer in the headlights, they drop their guava melons and simply stare.

The beautiful girl knows she’s beautiful and so she acts like you going out with her is some kind of rare privilege and if it was me, it would be because as I told you I’m ugly. Therefore using geometric logic, for a woman to feel I am not ugly she has to be uglier than I am; and for a woman to think I’m good-looking she has to be ugly and I mean real ugly.

I mean the kind of woman who when she gets together with co-workers to pose for a photo—- they hand her the camera.

So ugly than when her mom dropped her off at high school—-she got fined for littering.

This is a woman so ugly her face didn’t stop a clock—it actually caused the clock hands to spin backwards reversing time.

That’s how ugly.

There are other reasons too, sexual reasons.

It’s a proven fact (if I believe in it) that beautiful women often suffer from frigidity in the bed. They are so beautiful, so perfect; they have developed a “Queen Complex” or if they’re younger a “Princess Complex,” in which they say to themselves in their minds, “Okay I’m gorgeous and you’re not, you’re lucky just to be seen with me let alone the two of us together here in a carnal state of potential pleasure. Do everything. Perform everything…..while I just lay here doing nothing but looking beautiful.

Do and perform all the sexual work including the foreplay.

I’m not going to give a thing. I’m just going to lay back and see how well you do and if you don’t do well someone else will immediately take your place—-because I’m beautiful.”

Who in their right mind wants to do that much work?

That’s like single-handedly building a skyscraper. What fun is sex if you’re exhausted?

It’s like the old saying, “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy” just update that to read “All work and no WOW WOW WOW! Do that again!” makes Jack real dull.“

A beautiful woman, almost everyone who sees her wants to make love to her, but an ugly girl nobody wants to. For that reason, and you know the kind of woman I’m talking about, a woman so ugly that to practice birth control all she has to do is leave the lights on.

That kind of ugly woman…..

Sex for her probably is a rarity, such an infrequent act it reaches the point of incomprehensibility. For that reason she will work 60 times harder for you to make certain you enjoy it because if you do you’ll do it again. In that way sex is much like working overtime on your job, there has to be incentive (a pay raise) for it to happen.

When you’re with a beautiful woman and you go out with her to a bar you have to deal with all the wet lecherous stares from guys drinking liquor and lusting after your girl, and a possible painful beating for you if one hits on your girl and you have to defend her. Instead with an ugly girl they all feel sorry for you and avert their eyes and turn away. You can then brag to your ugly date, “See! They’re afraid of me, see how they turn away?”

Give this woman a MemoryTag card and tell her how much you appreciate hers and your (ugliness together), but instead of ugly use the words “ethnic looks.”

Tell her you’re hers’ forever. There’s a card for almost every kind of undying love. https://memorytag.cards/collections/anniversary

MemoryTag is the card that says just about everything from happy birthday to get well cards, graduation cards, Mother’s and Father’s Day cards, sympathy cards, weddings, anniversary cards, funny cards, weird cards,Valentine’s Day cards, thank you cards, all of them a fraction of the cost of a store-bought card and all with video message capability. https://memorytag.cards/