6th Virgin Sacrificed as White Collar Begins 6th Season on USA
Hollywood, CA- As the television series White Collar begins it’s sixth season on the USA Network, yet another nubile virgin starts her journey of sacrifice to appease the Lord of Hell. The Theistic Satanist producers of Fox Television began selecting their victim earlier this summer, just as network executives were meeting to decide the fall lineup. For six years in a row, this process has been a proven success.
“I don’t like to think about it,” said Tim DeKay, who plays Special Agent Peter Burke on the show. "I just know we’re back for another season and I’m really looking forward to working with the outstanding cast and crew of White Collar. If the higher-ups have to break a couple eggs to make that happen, well frankly, that’s not my business. I’m in the business of good acting not the business of appeasing some hell God. I’ll leave that up to Easty, haha.”
‘Easty’, or Jeff Easton as he’s known to most, is the executive producer of the People’s Choice Award nominated drama. “Dies irae, dies illa. Solvet Saeclum in favilla.Teste Satan cum sibylla.” said Easton when asked about the upcoming season of White Collar. “Quantos tremor est futurus. Quando Vindex est venturus. Cuncta stricte discussurus.Dies irae, dies illa!”
“The reality is, not every show creator or his or her writing staff can tap into brilliance.” said Tim Goodman of the San Fransisco Chronicle in his review of White Collar. “Where a show like White Collar succeeds, is in it’s unholy pact with Lucifer. In exchange for the lifeblood of a chaste woman, the show boasts high ratings and critical acclaim episode after episode. ”
This show, along with many others, will have it’s season debut starting this November. It’s rumored Satan has quite a lot on his plate this year having a hand in the majority of the USA Network’s line up, several programs on E!, as well as, ironically, Jane The Virgin.