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January 16, 2013

His girlfriend may be fake, but his statement is real.

It was revealed today Notre Dame star linebacker and NFL prospect, Manti Te'o, was involved in a hoax regarding the death of his alleged girlfriend, Lenny Kekua. After playing the season in her honor, an investigation has revealed that not only did she never die, but she never even existed.

Here's Te'o's statement on the matter:

"I am very sorry I hurt everyone. It is true that Lenny Kekua is not from Stanford. Nor did she pass away this fall. She is my Canadian girlfriend. She can not be contacted at this time because she is off doing a photoshoot in France. She is a model. Also, I'd like to apologize to my friends and family, as I had told them I once saw rode a unicorn across the the Atlantic Ocean. As you can imagine, that is untrue, a nearly impossible feat.

I would also like to thank my friends and family, who have stood by side throughout this season. My father has been there for me since I was a kid. My grandparents, who I loved dearly. I never met my great-grandfather, but here is a picture of him that my Dad showed me when I younger.

I request that you respect my privacy during this troubling time. This is no different than the time I told my teammates that I needed some time off after I was abducted by aliens and my body needed to readjust the earth's atmosphere.

Thank you,
Manti Te'o