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255 Funny Votes
116 Die Votes
Published: April 28, 2015
Description: Someone invented a dildo that holds the ashes of a dead loved one? I've been getting off with the ashes of my enemies for years!
  • Use the ashes of your conquered opponent as glitter to bedazzle that dildo you’ve had since you were 19.
  • Pour the ashes into a pile on your bed and hump at it until you reach orgasm.
  • Freeze them into a popsicle and shove that up there.
  • Throw the ashes up into the air, allow them to drift gently over your naked body, and rub them all up on you to completion.
  • Dump that whole urn down your lady shoot and shake it all around until the stimulation allows for climax.