Obama Orders Drone Attacks on Eastern Idaho Zombies/Vows to Eliminate Internet
President Obama met with DOD officials late Wednesday afternoon to discuss potential drone attacks on Eastern Idaho. Mr. Obama stated that he would order the attack based on internet rumors of looming zombies in the area. After a raucous stir of laughter from everyone in the meeting, Obama postponed the drone attack and blamed Joe Biden and “his nasty evil little internet” for the failed idea. Obama later released a statement saying that he plans to get rid of the internet indefinitely.