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January 26, 2010


Writer's block sucks. I don't consider myself a writer, but I do like to rant about things that are on my mind like many other people. I haven't done the blog thing in over a couple years, but I am considering going back to virtually ranting to no one. Here's a sample of things that pissed me off back in '07:

Thursday, September 20, 2007


You crazy cat. We thought you killed your wife and her friend when we saw you on that slow speed chase in that infamous white ford bronco of yours. Then you were tried in court and we all watched to find out, that according to the jury, you were not guilty after all. The media hype settled down soon enough. so you could go back to hitting the links and work on that golf swing. You seemed to take the tragic slaying of your wife quite well. Oh blah di, oh blah da. Right,OJ?

Time passed and you were just left behind as a 90s pop culture reference, but you found a way passed that. You vowed that you would find your wifes killer(s) and you put your best sleuthing skills to work. You got into the psyche of a killer, you thought like a killer. You thought so much like a killer that you wrote a book about it. Aptly titled "If I Did It", you told a hypothetical story of how you would go about executing a double murder, just to remind us that you "didn't" do it.

Your book made it to the shelves. You went out to Vegas, you planned an oceans four heist to get back what you believed was yours or should be, but you weren't able to pull it off, but "if you did", you probably wouldn't be facing these few life term felonies your looking at now. We have yet to find out if you are guilty of that, but hey on the bright side, if you end up in prison you could write a follow up book. Maybe "How I Should Have Done It".

Wednesday, September 26, 2007 

Super Size Me Too

McDonalds is an evil corporation. They continue to promote obesity to our nations youth by making there grease absorbed product seem hip and trendy, like it is an accessory to being cool. Shortening lifespans all across the globe to a cheerful tune of a street corner acapella group crooning the words "I'm lovin' it". They are leaders of an industry fueled by greed that shows no disregard to the health and well being of their fellow man....plus they end breakfast too early.

Thursday, December 06, 2007 

Pursuit of Crappiness

Will Smith Will be making his directorial debut with his remake of the great cult classic 'The Karate Kid'. What the fuck?

It is bad enough that there were shitty sequels that followed after such a great movie, but at least they had that unintentional cheesy charm. But now Will fuckin' Smith decided to take a shit on classic film history and remake the original. When it comes to leading roles in blockbuster movies Ralph Macchio doesn't have much under his black belt, but he was born for the part of young Daniel LaRusso. Will Smith has fucked nostalgia in the ass and repeatedly punched it in it's balls as a reach around by having his son play the lead role. It gets worse, the late Noriyuki "Pat" Morita (may he rest in peace) who played the legendary Mr. Miyagi, my childhood Dalai Lama, will be replaced by Jackie fucking Chan. Fuck you Will Smith.

When a movie is deemed "classic", it means it has reached it's highest status, it also means don't fuck with it. A remake of a classic can never make classic status. So why even make it? Hollywood producers are becoming retarded and from the amount of shitty movies made each year, are assuming their major demographic are too. Wake the fuck up filmmakers. Be original with your work, the more original it is, the better chance it will become a classic.

2007 (sigh) them were simpler times.